Squid Various

Wherein I write tweets for other people

For Kari Edwards:

“Oh, religious studies? Do you want to be a pastor?” “Let me answer your question with a question. If I had said ‘parasitology,’ would you have asked me if I wanted to be a tapeworm?”

For the Hot Amish Chick:

Had to dunk my smokes in the washtub to hide them from Tobias. Am now using cigarette cravings as a reminder to pray. Have never felt holier in my life.

And later:

God, I need a smoke…

…amen.

Either of these could apply equally well to myself right now, but it works better coming from them. Use them well, girls.